Dec 4, 2005

Its a lump! Its Humpty Dumpty! No wait, thats me!

When you look in the mirror, do you see all of you? Do you see the whole picture or do you develop tunnel vision and only see those parts of yourself that you feel could use improvement?

I have noticed that I have a tendency towards tunnel vision. I look in the mirror and I only see that part of my stomach that sags and looks terrible. Now I know that a lot of that is due to the way my stomach stretched having Little Princess but it is also due to the fact that I have gained weight.

The point is, when I look in the mirror, I truly only see that part of my stomach. I could be sporting a blue mohawk and fabulous new earings and I will still only see that part of my anatomy. If I want to see the rest of me, I have to force myself to focus.

This is really dumb. On a conscious level, I don't believe that other people look at me and only see that part of my stomach, but on some level I do think that. I see that and think, "Oh MY GOD! I look like HUMPTY DUMPTY!" And I am horrified. I think that everyone who sees me looks at me and is just as horrified as I am. I feel like they will look at me and discuss how I am a fat pig who really just let myself go. Yes folks, My name is Twisted Cinderella and I have a problem.

(on another note, Little Princess just came in and looked at me and said, "Hi mommy." I said hi, and she replied, "Is it dark in here?" I replied yes, I hadn't turned on the lights. She asked me, "Are you scared?" I said no, the dark isn't anything to be scared of and she decided to go over and turn on the lights for me anyway just in case it really was scarey.)


Anonymous said...

I totally focus on the parts of me I'm no so happy with. And you're right. I'm sure people look at the whole package rather than just little bits of us. Although, I find myself always drawn to the gawking at the part of someone's body that I don't like about mine. It would be so much better to just accept ourselves for what we are, but easier said than done.

Anonymous said...

i don't really find that i look at myself in the mirror that much, in the morning, when i'm first up, but not really at all through the day. i think we all see our own flaws to easily, it's when you have a child that sees you for who you really are, not what you look like, that's when you should then go and look in the mirror, cuz they aren't seeing any flaws.

Anonymous said...

HAHA, we must be cut from the same cloth. I feel that way about myself as well. But you know, the other day my daughter was like, "Mommy, when I grow up I want to be JUST LIKE YOU" and then she proceeded hug me around my humpty dumpty middle, and she was like, "You're so cozy to hug mom, you're the best mommy ever". Teary and blurry eyed? Oh Yeah! So although most of us have that access baby stretch/fat and have put on even more poundage, I try really hard ot look at it as my badge of honour for having the kiddies.

Thanks for your kind words on my blog BTW, nothing serious but enough to deflate my happy bubble. Huggs,


Anonymous said...

Rule of thumb: Avoid mirrors. I hate mirrors I guess because they don't lie. I've been real good in the dieting department and I think I have managed to get the ol' tummy down a little. And, oh good God, 'tis the season to get fatter. I'll never win.

Anonymous said...

I guess I have a problem too. I look in the mirror and see my fat belly, double chin, and pimples! I hate it all! Just take it away!!!

Anonymous said...

I'm like you, I focus on what I don't like rather than finding the positives.

I'm also a negative thinker and I berate myself a lot. I've been wanting to challenge myself to stop every negative thought and replace it with a positive one. I just haven't done it yet, it's going to be hard!

Anonymous said...

I could probably draw eerily accurate drawings of every part of me that I hate. Having four kids, especially carrying twins the last time, did some not nice things to this body.

I guess I try not to think about it. Sure, I could lose some weight, but there are things I can't change. Guess while you are focused on it, I am still in denial.

Anonymous said...

How sweet of Little Princess to look out for you!

Anonymous said...

I guess I am in the minority. I purposely focus on the good stuff I like about my body when I look in the mirror. I'm very far from perfect and fit, and I am aware of what I would like/need to change and work on to get it where I would like it, but stay focused more on the things I don't wanna change. I stay postive.