I have a little obsession I would like to share with all of you. When I feel like money is about to get real tight, I become obsessed with getting groceries. Every little bit of money we happen to get, I poke into my purse and I trot down to the store to get more groceries. If we are doing fine and we are having no financial issues, it is not a problem, I get them every pay day like a normal person, but if we are having money issues, (like now) I can't help but get groceries every chance I get. I thought about it and I think it stems from the combined impact of several incidents in my life.
When I was a teenager, my father did seasonal work. One year, he didn't get his seasonal job and that meant that by the middle of winter we were out of money, low on food, and he was too proud to go to get help. We had gotten a LOT of caplin (little fish) earlier in the year and my father had smoked some, and my mother had frozen and bottled some. By the middle of winter, that was all we had left. For breakfast, lunch and dinner, we had caplin. My mother, bless her heart, was creative and tried to do different things with the caplin but after a while a fish is a fish. I hated them. To this day, I hate them. But I remember being that poor and having no food in our cupboards.
When I moved in with roommates in my twenties, we all had the same employer, who was a friend of ours. He started having financial troubles and as a result was having difficulty paying us. I remember the constant phone calls from the bill collectors, I remember pleading with our landlords to wait until we had money for rent, I remember everything being piled up on our shoulders and there was NOTHING in our cupboards. Nothing. Not salt and pepper, not bread, butter or milk. NADA. I opened our pantry and it was completely bare as was our fridge. I remember sitting together and counting out our pennies together and being thrilled when we came up with $5 so we could go to the store and try to buy some food for two or three days with it. A friend gave us one bag of moose steaks (because they were too tough) and another friend gave us 1/2 a grocery bag of potatoes. We sat down and cried. It was food. We had something to eat. But I remember being that poor and having no food in our cupboards.
When I went back to college, it was because I wasn't making enough money to get by on. I was working and working and only getting further and further behind. My older brother and I moved in together and went back to school to better our lot in life. However, for the first 2 months we lived together we had no income at all. It came down to a big 20 kg bag of rice and a bottle of soya sauce. Every day we went to school and had rice with soya sauce for lunch. Then we came home and had it for supper. Every day. It wasn't all that nutritious but it was filling and we got by. But I remember being that poor and having no food in our cupboards.
I think that is why I am the way I am today. As long as we pay our rent and we have food in our cupboards I feel like we will be okay. When I get groceries and I fill our cupboards, I get a sense of satisfaction and a feeling that no matter how bad it is, at least we won't be hungry. At least my family will be fed. At least my little girl won't be stuck eating fish, or rice, or moose. At least we will be safe. I look at our full cupboards and I feel a a sense of calm. And when money is tight, I feel this insane need to buy more groceries, to stock our already full cupboards with more food, just in case.
Easter Bunny
When we were in the mall the other day, we passed by the Easter Bunny. Little Princess was beside herself with excitement. She had never seen him before and she was thrilled. When I saw how excited she was, I had to take her to see him. It was only $10 and we did get just a little extra money on Friday, so over we go and she sits in his lap. She chatters away, telling him about her her plans for the day, and her sparkly pink running shoes, he gives her a big hug and shows her his big fuzzy feet. He was so taken with her that when we were leaving he reached over and grabbed a CD of High School Musical and gave her. (he did not give it to the person before or after us).
Tough Girl Pose
Little Princess picked up her daddies hat today and looks at me and starts posing like a gangster. I don't know where she got it or her poses, but it was so cute to see her trying to be tough. My dainty little Princess being a gangster was more than I could handle and I had to grab a camera.
Decision
Little Princess has been giving me a hard time lately about eating meat. She has started refusing more and more meats and just eating parts of her meal. I have decided that from now on, I am going to give her a choice between my vegetarian meal and her daddy's omnivore meal. At least I know I make my vegetarian meals with enough nutrition for her and that is so much better than her just eating bits and peices of her daddy's meal. I can plan her nutrition a little better.
Here is her admiring my vegan pancakes yesterday. (which she shared with me)
Btw, this POST is about the cutest thing I have seen in a long time.
12 comments:
I can see where you would have a thing about grocery shopping after living like that.
And your daughter is very adorable in those pics. Good luck getting her to eat right!
My grandfather, who passed on many years ago, was from a large family where money was tight. He always used to stockpile groceries (canned goods, etc..) because it made him feel better, just knowing there would always be enough to get by. Your post reminded me of him :)
That picture of Little Princess with the Easter Bunny is adorable. How sweet the Easter Bunny gave your daughter that CD. What a kind and generous Easter Bunny :)
I hear you on the grocery front - when the cupboards are full I feel so content - and when things slow down near the end of the month I kind of begin to panic a bit.
I remember days when we'd eat sidepork and plain noodles and not know where the next meal would come, but mom always had smokes...the irony of it.
Today I make sure before anything else that we have a roof over our heads and food in the cupboards - nutritious meals not just plain macaroni.
I remember as a kid for a snack I'd take a slice of bread then break pieces off and roll it in a ball in my hands and eat these little balls of bread...ewwww, what was i thinking.
Your vegan pancakes look quite good and obviously your daughter knows what she likes already, some people are just not meat eating folks.
The same thing with my husband he likes to stockpile groceries. His dad is from a large family, so his father did the grocery shopping, so I'm learning to buy more and shop less. I normally go every other couple of days, but I'd like to go only once a week.
As long as the rent's paid, there's food on the table, and we are healthy, then that's all that matters to me too.
Very adorable pics of 'Lil princess. I especially like the ones where she's eyeing the pancakes.
BTW,I nominated you for an award! :)
Blogger is funny sometimes I can leave a link, and sometimes it won't let me.
I have been in the emoty cupboard times myself. And my son has also given up all meat. I actually have used a few of your recipes and he loved the soup.
Mmmm, those pancakes look yummy!
I love the pic of Princess with E. Bunny =)
I love the pic of the princess all gangster like...so cute!
I can understand your fear... I have a cupboard, and freezer full of food, and I worry about being able to feed the family, not that I have ever been hungry like you described, but it is completely understandable to me.
Your princess is so cute! Is being able to have your photo taken with the Easter Bunny something new?
Those pancakes look so good. Could you put the recipe on your blog?
I am concerned and ashamed to comment on your blog. And you can immediatly remove my comment. But I want let you know that you have lovely and sweet kids. I will come back and have a look.
I like that you are so open to post pictures of your children, I would too, but not everybody would.
I like cooking as well. What makes me crazy here in North America is all the fast food. Good that you cook something by yourself for your children. Take care.
When we were growing up, we didn't have a lot of money either. My mother sometimes sold furniture to get $$. Today there's nothing that makes me happier than a full fridge!
Your daughter is the cutest thing I've seen in a long time! That's G-rated I mean!
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