Mother in Law

My mother-in-law came to visit. She is the very opposite of every mother-in-law you hear about in song and movies. She is wonderful. It was so nice to visit with her again. We shared pics and stories. We cried over scrapbook pages I had created. It was a nice bonding time together. I wish we could have spent more time together but that was not to be this visit.

My little princess is off to day care today. I am so proud of how she is doing. She loves it and is mostly very well behaved there. I worry sometimes that she is going to misbehave while there but so far there hasn't been much negative feed-back. She is so funny when she gets off the bus, she sees me and yells, "MOMMY!" and then once she is in my arms, it is confession time, "Mommy I was a bad girl today. I went past the purple post." or "Mommy, I was a good girl today! But I didn't eat my soup." She has no guile at all. She tells me everything. Can I just bottle that instinct until she is a teenage and tells me nothing.

What is it about some families that makes it so hard for them all to get along. I know that my husbands family loves each other. I know that deep down they really do want the best for each other. But whenever they all are in the same city at the same time, drama ensues. It makes me sad. In the end everyone gets dragged into it, everyone gets upset and even the innocent are left feeling guilty. I hate that. I hate feeling like I have to choose sides. I hate that my favorite people (my wonderful mother-in-law and my favorite uncle-in-law) are on opposites sides. I love them both dearly with all my heart. I am so grateful that they have made me a part of their family. I thank god every day that he led me to my wonderful prince charming, his mother and his uncle. I just wish everyone in his family would learn to let the past be the past and to move forward.

I guess in some ways I could listen to my own advice. I should learn to forgive his aunt for the drama she caused when I had my daughter. I should learn to forgive her for telling terrible stories about what a bad mother I was, I could learn to forgive her for threatening us, I could learn to forgive her for causing a rift between my mother and my father-in-law. I am still working on those forgiving feelings. If she could stop causing drama, I could see me eventually letting my mother-bear protectiveness go enough to forgive her the past and move on. But it just feels like when I try some new drame errupts and all the old stuff comes up.

Maybe that is the way it is for the rest of his family too. They want to forgive but new drama's bring up old pains. I have no great epiphany, no words of wisdom to make it better. I just have a lot of love that I would really like to share with them all. But I fear that I may never be able too.