It's All Different Now

One of my favorite parts of Christmas is the movies.  I love them.  I save every one I can find on our DVR and then whenever I get a chance, I watch them.  The kids run around, stopping to watch when they catch their interest, moving on when they feel like it.  Sometimes Prince Charming will watch some with me, sometimes Princess Belle will.  I just love them.  I have them broken down into kinds of Christmas movies, I can almost tell you what is going to happen, but I don't care.  I love them.  They are warm and caring and remind me of the magic and wonders of Christmas.

I never grew up celebrating Christmas.  I was that kid with my nose pressed up to the window of other peoples houses watching while they celebrated knowing that at my house it was just any other day.  I would sneak the opportunity to watch Christmas movies and wish.  For 28 years, I could only watch other people as they celebrated the holidays, but that is all changed now and now when I am watching Christmas movies, I am happy.  I get to give this to my kids.  With my family, I get to create all the memories I never got to have.

Even Little Prince watches the lights, rocks to the Christmas music, even as he looks straight ahead he still smiles at the enthusiastic response of his sisters.  Even if Autism keeps him trapped inside his body, and even if he sometimes needs to take a break from the excitement, I know he is loving the holidays as much as his sisters, he isn't like me watching from the outside, wishing, he is a part of it too.

So Christmas comes early to my house.  I decorate as soon as Prince Charming will let me, I watch every movie, create as many traditions and memories as I can and I curl up with coffee and Christmas movies and enjoy every minute of it can.  All of this is for me and my family and I am making up for lost time.