Thoughts on my idiosyncrasies

I realized something about myself today. I don't look people that I am not comfortable with in the face. I had been out running around and I had some difficulty climbing over a snow bank to get to my van. As I struggled a family of three were getting out of their car and the man helped me out.

As I drove away, I thought about it and I realized that I had no idea what any of them looked like. I had not seen one of them above the shoulders. I smiled and I thanked them, but I was speaking to their feet. I could have turned around and three other people could have taken their place and I wouldn't have known the difference. I had no idea of age, race, or anything other than gender and that because I heard their voices.

I thought about it further and realized that I don't recall seeing anyone's face other than the people at the cash register (their job gives me a level of comfort). Thinking back on my life, I realize that I have always been that way. There are so many people who I have experiences with, whom I have dealt with in an in depth manner that I don't look at. And as a result when they see me later on the street, they recognize me, but I don't recognize them. I never looked at their faces.

I have always known that I have a very strong personal space barrier. I am very uncomfortable with being crowded by anyone, with any people being in my personal space and especially with being touched by people I am not completely comfortable with.